I’ve read or listened to a few books on how to be likable and influence others. In an effort to save you all the trouble of reading/listening to those books, I think I can sum up the majority of it in 3 very simple words. As some of you may know, I’m terrible at all three of these, which is why I find this topic so important to keep revisiting regularly. I practically have to brainwash myself to do these three things. I you can get yourself to do these three things regularly, it is practically a guarantee that you will have much more influence with those around you. Without further ado, here are the three common sense solutions to becoming well-liked (If you see links in my articles they are often links to where you can buy the book being referenced on Amazon):
Everyone wants to be interesting. Unfortunately being interesting only matters if someone is interested. Be interested and listen to others and you’ll be more interesting to be around, and it can be almost self serving, because typically after listening, someone will more intently listen to you. Just Listen by Mark Goulston is a great read if you would like to learn more about how to become a better listener. Matter of fact, I recommend reading this book annually or more to refresh the content in your mind. Another book that will help you listen with your eyes is What Every Body is Saying by Joe Navarro. This book will help you pick up on body language that you may otherwise miss if you’re not familiar with what different postures/gestures may mean.
One of the best ways to create a better experience for everyone around you is to smile. This can help you at work, closing a sale, making new friends, etc. This is fairly obvious and requires an individual to change their mindset to execute properly. If you can find a way to put yourself in a mindset that allows you to feel like smiling, you need to do it. This could make all the difference.
Nobody likes someone who compliments without being genuine (it can come off as slimy), but if you see something you like about someone else, tell them. Be honest, but don’t hold it in. It makes both you and the person being complimented feel better and can even provide a boost of energy to both parties. Along with this is never speaking negatively about others, even when they’re not around. Generally speaking negatively will not only turn off the person you’re speaking about, but it can hurt your image with anyone else who hears you. This idea was taken from Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People.
It’s almost embarrassing to post this, considering how bad I am at all three of these, but I hope at least one of you reading this found this advice as useful as I have, and maybe it gives you something to start working on today. If you have any books or reading that you recommend on this topic, please let me know in the comments below. Thanks for reading and remember to be great today! If you like my posts please also remember to like/follow me on Facebook. Thanks again!